I have at least fifty blog posts sitting in “drafts”
What to post and why and how is a daily question
Sometimes it is answered simply
A piece of poetry flows out onto the keyboard easily and nicely and I hit post because it just says it all so concisely.
Then there are the other days when I sit and ponder and stare at the wall and come up with another draft post
I may have too many thoughts
Or not enough
I may write 5000 words
Then hit save
Nope not quite right, so I just leave it in drafts
And then write another 2000 get hammered out on a different topic or the same one but from another angle
Still not right
Sometimes I give up and wander off
Nothing much to show after all.
Because the thing is with draft posts – they most often don’t make it out there into the big wide world
Sometimes it is because we haven’t quite got to the way of conveying exactly what it is we are trying to communicate
Sometimes we change our mind
So they (the drafts) loll about sulking
Reminding us of what we thought when we thought we were thinking about something very seriously
Or of some great import
Yet it smacked just a little
of something else
or rather lacked
Most of my draft posts remain draft posts because they are just not quite right
Sometimes I can’t put my finger on why I don’t continue on with a piece but I have now
They lacked – even if in a small way – a line – something conveyed…
They lacked complete authenticity.
I never post anything which I don’t authentically feel or believe.
But beliefs and thoughts change.
Today I was nashing my teeth and torn.
This is the blog post which I needed to have to move on – it is just for me so you can leave now if it is all becoming a bit
Or not – whatever you want to do
I wanted to bring the blog up to date on the fact that I have chosen to let a bit more meat into my diet and why. I know, I know – why is this important in a world that is falling apart, why is what somebody eats important? Well of course it isn’t – not to the wider world but to this blog it is.
Because to continue on with anyone (if anyone actually cares:) labouring under the notion that I never eat meat when in fact I do now seemed wrong.
Less than authentic.
The thing is – I have no idea who this human being is that decided that they needed to inform everyone of anything to do with my diet at all.
Unfortunately it appears she is me
Or rather was
Then I realised I didn’t have to explain – much of what I would have tried to explain already existed in my Tripping over Animals post. I just hadn’t taken that authentic mental and heartful shift into my everyday diet yet.
I have now.
Yet authenticity should need no explanation.
People change – they’re supposed to.
The only people that don’t change are the ones who lack the self awareness to do so – nobody is born perfect
Or rather everyone is
We just spend the rest of our lives trying to get back to that place after life, other people, education and in the end ourselves – lead us to layer up in inauthentic stripes of paint. Most of it entirely unintentional.
I had much of my layering stripped off in the course of one days motorbike travel the other day.
I learnt a great deal and continued to do so over the next week or so.
Still am – always will because what is life but a series of lessons.
I’ve changed and in amongst that change is the fact that I eat a little more meat – not much, just enough to be in line with my new ethos that the new black is not Vegan – it is authenticity.
Because at it’s heart that is what authenticity is:
It is flexible
It is mercurial
It is personal
It’s only true reference points are change and adaptability
This desire to label ourselves, to provide some sort of point around which the world can pin us is something delivered to us by the educational system who were so bent on grading and marking and examining and labelling
It is dogma and not a healthy reality.
A healthy reality is to be comfortable with change and adapting to it – that is the only reality which has allowed humans to evolve from being at the mercy of the ecological system to dominating it.
I wish we could take time backwards and live as non harming human beings on this planet – as part of the food chain that did not decimate it – however that time is long gone – we are now living in a dangerously unbalanced world and the only way to restore balance is to become balance
And to seek it internally
The way to do that is to enter into an ever more discerning circle of discovering and embracing our own authenticity.
And now we are up to date.
Oh and I also drink wine now and then and have given up giving it up as well because – as part of a balanced lifestyle it is a nice thing to have around. So that is an update to the Whining about Wine post and
Thanks for putting up with the blog I needed to have 🙂
The header pic? The photo is one I took years ago, I found it the other day languishing among thousands of others on my hard drive, over processed of course because I was into that back then. Yet the mood of the photo remains the same.
They look happy and authentic – just enjoying the sunshine and playing – so it fits this post.