String Instruments

Hot air, blown into balloons

Holding threads, I grip them tightly

The winds of change cause them to jostle

Rubber has the oddest sound

A screech and groan

I lift off my toes

And I am flying

The wind at least has a purpose

But it blows in all directions

The person who clings to balloons and strings

Will soon be utterly lost

Hot air may give the illusion of lift, as of course it rises

But what point?

If it heads for any horizon

Balloons are fragile vessels on which to stake a journey

I let go

Watch them rise and drift away, dig my toes in soil, flex

A balloon pops, shattering high above

And I am glad I no longer hold onto useless strings

Empty hands are always grateful, ready to be filled

*a super quick trip to the coast – 12 hours driving for a day and a half – was it worth it? Hell yes. A swim in the ocean, is worth double that in driving to me these days.

The thing is about trips away, particularly fast ones, they seem to pick you up from whatever headspace you are in and hurtle you into another.

It’s discombobulating. Coming home and unpacking I found myself trying to recall what it was exactly I had been working on and trying to again muster enthusiasm and motivation.

I didn’t find these things in my suitcase, in there were just dirty clothes that needed washing. I didn’t find it in all the jobs that I should have been doing over the week-end but now await me on Monday morning instead (lots of them). Sigh.

That’s the thing with motivation and enthusiasm – they are fragile things. Liable to drift away and leave you to clean up the mess left behind. Great fun to play with but like balloons, they all pop and suddenly you’re back on earth, probably hard on your backside trying to pick up the pieces of your to do list.

I was thinking about this tonight as I plan the week ahead. I’m not relying on motivation and enthusiasm anymore. Instead I’m making small achievable adjustments towards what I want every day. Regardless of where I am, my framework of small adjustments, some rather boring, but all carrying me forward, will keep me headed in the right direction.

Luckily I already have quite a few habits I’ve been working on, to begin my Monday with, I will add some more as I go along. For now – my good sleep habits are calling me to bed. Catch you later on in the week – hope it is a great one for everyone.

* beautiful header photo courtesy of Adi Goldstein Unsplash

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