I watched you

watching it

Standing still

mesmerised.

Feet anchored deeply mired

in sand that disappeared

sliding through your toes

Perfectly still

Perfectly calm

You stood like a candle

Without melting

And then finally, with a graceful turn

Bending

To build a sandcastle

With the same gentle intensity

I wondered who your parents were

You seemed so alone

I turned to take photos in another direction

When I turned back

you were gone,

disappeared into the ether

Only your sandcastle remained

Until the sea washed that away too.

My memory of you will take much longer

to fade.

The way

You were so still

Infiltrated my consciousness

Invaded my senses

I wanted what you had

I’m determined to get it

I stood

Where you stood

And I watched what you watched

my feet shifted

my mind tossed.

My breath was the ocean

Choppy.

Your sense of presence

a shadow in my mind

reminded me

that peace is

distraction lost

and all of the cost of thinking too much

Insanity

I tried really hard

to be still

like you

Still do

I close my eyes

see you standing there

Ocean sprite

Still as a rock

Calm

Steady

Bright

The candle that never melts

Yet burns with shimmering intensity

*Yesterday I spent the afternoon and evening on the beach. (We are away for the week-end). I went for a swim in the cold fresh water and then snapped photos as the light changed into extraordinary colours of evening.

There was a little girl, in a floaty dress who stood motionless at the edge of the ocean. Where other kids ran around, she was utterly still, staring out into the waves. Five minutes, ten minutes, I don’t know how long she stood there – ages. Utterly still.

If you have experienced the ocean, you would know the sand gets sucked away by the water as it breathes in and out. She didn’t even seem to shift her feet. Her stillness gathered me in, I watched her, watching it. Wishing I could harness that power to be still.

Be still and know that I am, the book says. I wrote a post only a few days ago on how I must always be in motion. But like the curly haired girl that longs for straight hair, I wish I could be the woman that sits, or stands, still, calm.

She was just a little girl. although she disappeared, like an angel, the mermaid that perhaps she was, but it doesn’t matter, now she lives in my consciousness.

As I sit here in morning sun, after a walk, and a run and then a swim, all of my motion has ceased, I close my eyes, and see her.

Stillness.

I’m going to learn how to do that.

Somehow.

The little sprite is in the header photo and just below. Also a few other photos from the evening. Have a wonderful week-end X