The Ferris Wheel

I was happy

In retrospect

Which isn’t actually happiness

It’s just an ephemeral memory of a moment that if I had been fully present

I could have had my fill

And then I wouldn’t be yearning

Wasting another precious moment

Before it is gone

*happiness in retrospect is not true happiness, it is a memory.

Intangible and ephemeral.

We may not have this moment, laughing with this special person ever again. Because tomorrow they may be gone.

Moment after moment after moment – so many precious fleeting moments.

We lose this moment thinking about another, we look backward, we plan forward.

And another moment that could have been filled with peace, with bliss, with happiness is gone

I want to live a life, this life, while I’m in it

Our mind makes that aspiration very difficult, if we allow it to carry us away, as it does, again and again

The Ferris wheel reminds me that we are given these buckets of bodies and minds that we fill up with experiences and around and around we go.

But at some stage we are going to have to step out of this moment and into something unknown

We will leave

And someone else takes our place on the wheel

So let’s not waste those views

And enjoy our turn, while we still can

19 thoughts on “The Ferris Wheel

  1. This is a beautiful and reflective piece of writing! It is something to aspire to but, as you say, it is not as easy as you might first think! Thanks for sharing this one Kate!

  2. Sometimes it’s hard to overcome anxiety in the moment, but when it’s over you see there was nothing to be anxious about, and then the happiness can begin. It’s sad but true.

    • Funnily enough I have more anxiety pre event then during the event itself. I tend to be fine in the moment, and remind myself of that when I begin to worry ahead of time. But everyone is different and some conditions make it difficult to be comfortable in the present moment, I hadn’t thought of that Jeff.

  3. This is such a thoughtful piece, Kate, and so beautifully written. It’s certainly made me think about my own situation. I guess while I’m dealing with so many difficult memories from the past, I’m hardly paying any attention to the present moment. Those last four lines really hit home for me. That’s truly food for thought, and thank you for this timely reminder. Xx 🌺💞

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