Worry is a kind of prayer

Worry is a kind of prayer

Or so I’ve come to realise

I thought it was a lack of faith

And perhaps it is, if it’s not directed anywhere

My worry has always been directed to God

And I believe it has always found its mark

Because there is very little that I have worried about

(And I’ve worried a lot)

That has ever come to pass

But there have been plenty of things

That I never saw coming

That arrived

And shocked me

I worried about them – then – too

And they were – then – never quite as bad as they could have been

They passed and left me wiser

Or stronger

And I moved on

Which is how I finally came to realise

That worry is prayer

And in knowing that

I finally relaxed

And worried less

Prayed more

From a faithful place

That puts great store

In something much greater than I will ever be

I have a little more patience now

With the worrier in me

*This realization is as recent as this afternoon. I got a phone call from a man that had potentially bad news. And I immediately began to worry about things.

I was thinking hard, taking the rubbish over to the skip across the yard when I stopped in frustration with myself. I had a lovely evening ahead planned with family coming over to have dinner for my eldest sons birthday.

This issue now loomed front of mind. I didn’t want it to occupy my thoughts, my cooking and lurk at the back of my smile invading happy conversation.

“How on earth do I stop this bloody worrying, I’m so tired of it?” I asked to no one in particular.

As I’ve mentioned in various posts – I’m a worrier. Have been since I was a little kid. I was much worse then but perhaps we just learn to hide it better.

Anyway I turned my mind instead to the problem of worry. How to stop it.

The thought entered my head that nothing (or nothing big that I can recall ever worrying about) had ever actually came to pass.

Or if it did – it ended up being a storm in a tea cup.

What a waste of energy, yet still here I was at fifty worrying about another “something that might happen” that I couldn’t control.

“What if worry is a kind of prayer?”

As I had this thought it made immediate sense to me.

All these things I worry about that never come to pass.

All the things that I never saw coming that did.

And then I worry about them and they never turn out as bad as they could have.

What if worry is prayer?

What if it is already answered as soon as we worry?

I don’t know if this will make a difference to anyone else but it does to me.

Worry is a kind of prayer – knowing this makes it so much easier to stop.

But just to make sure, I’ll always give any impending or potential issues a good worry first. Hey, the system has some damn good stats. It’s always worked

But then I will let it go, knowing now that prayers really are either answered or what is happening is for my own good.

We had a beautiful evening. My mind was fully engaged in the moment, in my family and the enjoyment of it all.

It was only now as I sat with a cup of tea that I remembered my earlier thoughts about worry and prayer. The issue no longer bothers me in the slightest – I know it is an answered prayer – it will either not happen or if it does, I will learn something from it and then like the fleeting event it was – it will disappear.

Everything passes, hopefully this afternoon is the last time I worry with anxiety, from now on I will do so with faith.

6 thoughts on “Worry is a kind of prayer

  1. Kate, I understand this well, like usual. 😘 it made me think of this quote~ “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” – Charles R. Swindoll
    Taking my thoughts captive is something I continue to “practice” daily (hourly!). I’m proud of you and hour prayer~and the moments being “present!” Much love! 💛

  2. Love this, Kate. I can so relate to so much of your beautiful poem. Praise God, we can go to Him at any time and He’ll trade our worries for His peace. Sending you big hugs xx

Leave a Reply